When I was a little girl I loved my favorite comic book hero, Wonder Woman.. I loved the magical place that she originated from (Olympus) and I loved how she made men tell the truth.. The truth has always been very important to me. I have always loved the idea of true justice; the cold and impatial justice that cuts through emotion and false perception to reveal the cold hard steel blade of truth.. When the Sword of Truth is used rightly it can cut away all of the weeds that strangle and decieve the true perception.. It is the melding of all perception that shows the truth.. This is what happened to my ex and I in court.
I watched Judge Chapman ( his real name ) as he heard and judged other cases before us. It was amazing to see this man at work as he weighed both sides at the same time while remaining impartial and unemotional even in the face of great emotion from the parties speaking to him… He cut through to the heart of the matter each time.. This was family court and the judge aways ruled in favor of the best interest for the children… He could see right away who was at fault and who was being to emotional.. he knew who had the best interest of the children at heart almost instantly.. Judge Chapman was about 47 but he seemed wisened above his years; he listened intently to every case as if it was the first case that he had ever heard.. Becoming a Judge was this man’s calling as it was very apparent that he was passionate about his job. I think that it was more of away of being for him than it was work.. it is a natural talent that is being well used to serve the community.
My ex and I were called to stand before him; he heard both sides with great intent; I told him how I had kept the kids from my ex as he had threated to take them from me as he didn’t believe that he should have to pay me support and alimony to watch his kids. My ex really didn’t say much; then the judge asked how far along we were in the separation process. He asked if we had a Separation Agreement worked up between the two of us. I then explained to the Judge that I had taken my ex to Fairway Divorce where they did up an agreement for us but my ex had refused to sign it. The Judge then asked if I had a copy of the agreement with me; Yes I did and it was given to the Judge.. the Judge asked my ex to look it over and asked him if he had a problem with signing an agreement that we had both agreed too in the first place. My ex was stuck! ( the judge had just cut through the BS so quickly that my ex had no room to wiggle; and I could tell he was shocked by how forth-right the Judge was in his actions and intent ) the judge’s intent was to do what was right for all five of us.. my ex, me and most importantly our three children. After a break the Separation Agreement was motioned before the court as legally binding..
But the judge did not stop there; he told us both that he could see that together we behaved like children; that we both had a huge chip on our shoulder from the hurt in the marriage break down… he told me that he couldn’t make my ex pay back the day care expenses that I incured on having to drop out of class and that my Lawyer shouldn’t of informed me that it was OK for me to go back to classes without running it by my ex first. We had found a clause in the Separation Agreement that we had to talk this over first.. so I couldn’t get the money back without taking him to court again. I told the judge that the stress to do so was not worth that amount of money.. The judge suggested to my ex that the right thing to do would be to pay the money back since Christmas was coming, but he told me he couldn’t make him do the right thing.
The Judge was right on all accounts; around my ex husband, I put up the stance that a child would use on facing the high school bully; I do posture and act tough, so that my ex will not bully me.. and of course this comes off childish. I am sure my ex sees me the same way; even though it pisses me off to think so.
The Judge did mention that we had made a huge step forward in making the agreement binding.. As for how much my ex added to that.. I am jaded by my perception to say for sure.. I did not mention to the judge that it was the same agreement that my ex offered to sign, when he had his lawyer call me to say that he was going to a six weeks before the court date.. If I had not set that date and if I had not put my foot down with my ex and refused to be bullied anymore that agreement would not have been signed.. if it was not for the judge cornering him with the facts and with rational logic, my ex would have tried everything that he could possibly get away with to leave the marriage with all of the assets.
I did feel like Wonder Woman that day.. felt as if I had tied the magic lasso of Truth around him, were I had brought him before the Judge to be weighed and measured by the scales of justice.. to be cut down by the sword of truth.
It was my hard work and courage that brought this to conclusion.
It was by fate that we were heard by such an a amazing Judge.